Show-and-Tell Video/Writing Fusion Extravaganza

15 Dec

Welcome. This is what I like to call a Show-and-Tell Video/Writing Fusion Extravaganza. Because it’s Show-and-Tell that is partially in writing, and part of it is in the form of a videoblog. I suppose I didn’t really need to explain that.

Well, I’m here to talk about two things that I love but am also very wary of. Those two things are McDonald’s Happy Meals and James Cameron movies. You probably didn’t think the two could ever go together, but thank God some mastermind had the idea to fuse them. But I’ll get to that good news in a minute.

So, first of all, McDonald’s Happy Meals. I think it’s fairly pointless to point out the awesomeness of Happy Meal toys. We all collected them as kids, we all asked the cashier if we could trade in our toys if our siblings got the same one, and I’m sure I’m speaking for everyone when I say we’ve all opted out of “grown-up” meals when there are Pokémon gadgets to be had. That’s when McDonald’s is at its best, when it creates a series of toys based on a new movie. That’s when the McEverything loving side of me rears it’s head until its inevitable stifling. For example:

Obviously I am a fan, but my main problem with these meal-improving collectibles is the segregation of “boy” and “girl” toys. Since I was a wee, little tomboy I’ve been upset by the designation of genders to toys. When I was a child I thought only boys were allowed to have “boy” toys and girls “girl” toys, so when I would tell my parents my order in line at the cash register I’d say “A hamburger Happy Meal. But tell them you have a boy” and then I would flee the line, hiding, because I was sure if the McDonald’s workers saw that I was not a boy they would not only stick me with a Barbie instead of a Hot Wheels toy, but likely ban me from the store forever. And, though I eventually figured out that boys can have “girl” toys and girls can have “boy” toys, it still really pisses me off that they would give them such titles. Making little girls believe they should like everything pink that comes with a comb and discouraging little boys who dig such things. Especially for boys, who have to deal with a lot more teasing for liking “girly” things. Okay, I need to stop this rant because I can go on for days. I’d like to be able to say that I’m starting a petition or writing a letter to McDonald’s, as well as every toy store in the world, to keep this from perpetuating any further, but I’m fairly lazy. I’m going to just complain here and hope that some politician who is, you know, in charge of McDonald’s Merchandise reads this and changes things. That’s my hope. And, yeah, that is a government job.

Enough about that, now on to Cameron movies. I’ve recently been re-watching some of his films (The Terminator, Terminator 2, part of Titanic, and The Abyss) and, man, I forget how awesome they are. I mean, no, the dialogue is never exceptional, the characters are generally archetypical, and the movies themselves are not the types of film that go on to win Best Picture… unless they do… but anyway, his films are always epic. They are epic in part because Cameron spends copious amounts of money on them, but even more so because he always pushes himself and his crew to break new grounds technologically. The Abyss was filmed mostly underwater in a nuclear plant turned water tank, Titanic had full-scale models and CGI that was revolutionary at its time, and for the upcoming Avatar, which has replaced Titanic as the most expensive movie of all time, Cameron co-created and utilized a 3-D fusion camera system that I still don’t quite understand, but is getting me pumped. I have my tickets for Friday, my seat perfectly picked out, and am ready to experience this film that has been 15 years in the making. I don’t expect for it to be a brilliant or thought-provoking film, but I do expect it to be an overwhelming spectacle to behold, due to Cameron’s past films and his new 3D fusions.

Speaking of fusions, here is the moment you’ve all been waiting for. The McDonald’s/Cameron baby:

Wondering what Titanic Happy Meal toys would have looked like,

Lara

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4 Responses to “Show-and-Tell Video/Writing Fusion Extravaganza”

  1. Charlie Bucket December 15, 2009 at 6:23 pm #

    these videos are captivating.

  2. daniela December 15, 2009 at 10:24 pm #

    “she’s like steve carrell from the office!” — dad, just now.
    yep. nough said.

  3. brent December 17, 2009 at 4:54 am #

    I’m about to pay you the biggest compliment I possibly can: The first video reminds me of the scene in ET where Elliott shows ET his toys (yes, because there’s boba fett toy, star wars, et al, but more so because of the lighting and the sounds of plastic toys being picked up and put down and shook around). So there you are, you made a video reminiscent of one of my favorite things EVER.

  4. sharon December 29, 2009 at 1:09 am #

    i got you another avatar toy btw.

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